I think that arguments and disagreements come under two categories: the necessary and the unnecessary. Sometimes when we find ourselves trapped in a number of necessary arguments with a person, we begin to create unnecessary arguments too when the necessary ones are never fully resolved. What I think would benefit us in some of the arguments and disagreements we find ourselves in are these three points:
- When you’re in an argument and disagreement, it can be hard to think outside you’re own position. But sometimes it would be very beneficial to look at the other side of the argument or maybe see where the other person is coming from. Try not to be defensive and instead take your own feelings out of the equation. What is that person angry or upset about or why have they acted a certain way? Once you have tried to establish this, even by asking them, you can decide whether its worth continuing the argument and standing your ground.
- Hand in hand with the first point, try to look at your own faults in the argument. Sometimes even if you are the one who is the victim or who is not in the wrong, maybe you have made too big of a deal of that other person’s mistake. Is this argument worth having? What am I trying to gain from it and will it be helpful in the long run? Have I gone about this the wrong way? You might not have many faults in the argument, but sometimes you can help the situation by not creating any.
- By acknowledging your own faults, especially if you are in the wrong, I think one of the strongest and most admirable qualities in a person is being able to admit them, to say sorry. And you might even find that by admitting your faults and by humbling yourself, the other person may be more willing to listen and more willing to understand and then accept their own mistakes, leading to a hopefully happy conclusion.
These are just some thoughts about stances and positions that you might want to consider in arguments or disagreements, and by no means is applicable to every argument or disagreements.