It can seem easier to make excuses for others, than to confront others and stand up for ourselves. It is easy to make excuses for other people’s behaviour, when we hold low self-esteem. It is easy to place the blame on ourselves and convince ourselves that we somehow deserve it. It is easy to make excuses for others when we are used to apologising for ourselves and adjusting ourselves other people’s moods and wills.
Of course, we should strive to see the good in others and to give people the benefit of the doubt, but it is unhealthy to persist in a relationship where we systematically find ourselves excusing other people’s ignorant, obnoxious and insulting behaviour. It leaves us with a negative outlook of not only our relationships, but of ourselves too. We cannot be afraid of having these feelings and speaking out. If those people cannot be considerate and receptive to our feelings, then we need to re-evaluate their significance in our life. If those people are incapable of change, then we need to change our environment, not our prospects and standards. We deserve better. When we make excuses for others, we are only making excuses against ourselves and a happier life.
“There is no passion to be found playing small, in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living” – Nelson Mandela