We cannot travel through life alone. But we need to make sure we choose to be around people who will guide us when we’ve lost our way, give us courage when we’re scared to move forward, and give us strength when we grow tired. We shouldn’t surround ourselves with people who constantly weigh us down or trip us up, no matter what excuses we make for them. You deserve to be surrounded by love. Don’t settle for something less.
(Image: The Flourish Studios Blog)
Let us be grateful to people who make us happy. They are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom ~ Marcel Proust
A lot hinges on our relationships and interactions with people around us: our energy, motivation, direction, choices, perspectives. That’s why it’s important we build solid, positive, fruitful and invigorating relationships around us. And cut our ties to those who take away from our life:
- The overlookers – we shouldn’t ever be made to feel worthless by those close to us. We shouldn’t ever be consistently ignored, excluded and belittled. We shouldn’t be constantly taken for granted. Although our self-worth should foremost come from within ourselves, relationships with others should nonetheless make us feel valued and appreciated.
- The nay-sayers – those around us shouldn’t distract us from where we want to go, with doubts, negativity, or self-importance. Our loved ones should encourage and push us forward, no matter how much they do not understand or agree with our choices. No matter how much they wish they could do the same too. Those close to us should want us to thrive.
- The game-changers – people who try to mould us into someone else or who won’t accept us for who we are will eventually be suffocating. And we shouldn’t have to change our very core principles and qualities for other people. We all have flaws and we should be able to embrace them, not escape them. We should be around people who love us for who we are.
We can all get heated in the moment. We can easily spit out words in anger, hate, tiredness or sadness. Sometimes it’s the only way to get the point across. But life is so unexpected. We all know it, yet we tell ourselves that bad things won’t happen to us. We’ll just say sorry tomorrow. Or we just won’t speak to them until they apologise. But something might happen. Don’t forget the bigger picture. Remember to say words of kindness, forgiveness, and love to those you care about. Tell the people you truly care about that you love them. Don’t let your last words with them be of anger or hate. Because tomorrow, you might not be able to take it back.
We might not be able to understand much about what Minions are saying, but what they show us speaks louder than words. I recently went to see Minions in the cinema, and I picked out three lessons we can learn from them:
- Always look out for each other – Whether we’re just offering a bit of comfort, courage or company, or whether we’re valiantly saving someone from getting blown to pieces, we should always take care of each other. It could make all the difference to that person, whether we realise or not.
- Be brave – It’s easy to get comfortable where we are because that’s what we know and that’s where we know we’ll be safe. But that doesn’t mean we’ll always be fulfilled and happy in that safe place. Don’t be afraid of stepping into the unknown and taking opportunities to experience more of life.
- Never give up – Life won’t hand us everything we want. But that doesn’t mean we can’t ever have it. Even if things feel like they’re not working out, sometimes we just need to take our time. We’ll get there in the end if we stay persistent. And it will be worth it.
Have you seen Minions? What would you add to the list?
There are so many different ways we try to impress people. But what shouldn’t we be doing? Here are three traps we find ourselves in when trying to get people to like us:
- Changing ourselves – It’s so easy for us to get ourselves into uncomfortable and unnatural situations when we want people to like us. We start acting similarly to the other person to tailor to their likes and dislikes in hopes that it will draw them to us. Sure, it’s good to get out of our comfort zone once in a while and put an effort into forming a connection with someone, but we should never pretend to be something we’re not. Find people who will respect and love you for who you are.
- Apologising – Alternatively, we might instead find ourselves apologising for any seemingly unfavourable, irritating or off-putting behaviours, habits, consequences or even for our lack of experience or knowledge. But we shouldn’t be putting ourselves down, making ourselves inferior or apologising for circumstances beyond our control just because we want to impress someone. Find people who will make you feel full and confident in who you are.
- Belittling others – In today’s society, it is common to hear people condemning others and tearing into their choices. But we shouldn’t be pressurised into criticising others just because other people are and because we want to fit in. That cycle will never end up well for anyone, including us. Find people who will spread love and positivity, because that will shape who you are.
We always hear that there are plenty of fish in the sea. And we all know that there will always be people who lift us up and weigh us down. Yet, we still sometimes find ourselves surrounded by those who push us around, step on us, and pick us up whenever it suits them. There are the manipulative, the controlling, the pessimistic. And it infests our lives.
I’m not saying we cut out every person that makes us feel anything other than happy – some people are worth it. But sometimes we need to take courage and dive into that sea. We should find some positive people, ambitious people, passionate people, ones who see opportunity and possibility and not limitations and barricades. We can’t always be the one to be all those things; sometimes we need encouragement from outside ourselves. We need people who push us to be better, who make us laugh, and who are non-judgemental. So let’s take a swim.