Being honest is often daunting, but also liberating. Being honest with others and being honest with ourselves releases the weight of secrets, the pressures of pretence, and the tangles of a tale. We shouldn’t have to lie about who we are or what we do. It gets draining after a while, to the point where we can’t see a way out and life isn’t pleasant anymore. It might be daunting, but it’s true when they say that the truth will set you free.
Letting go of the past
It’s hard for us to forget our mistakes, and even harder for us to forgive ourselves. But whether we accept it or not, the past is done and dusted; it is written already. But that doesn’t mean the pen is out of our hands, that our story is already written. No, our story continues as long as we do. Whatever you do, don’t let it stop because of the past. There’s always time for a plot twist.
Following your heart
Don’t listen to others who tell you who to be, how to be, what to do, if you don’t agree. Whether it’s your family, your friends, your society, nobody has more power over you than you do. It’s exhausting trying to please everyone, meet their high standards, follow what is expected, because nobody’s outlook on life is the same. Nor should it be. Do you and be the best you that you can be. The rest will fall into place.
Our life isn’t always as bad as it seems inside our heads. Our opinions and emotions are nurtured by what we know and what we’ve seen. But if you were to look from the outside, what might you see? Would it be a bad life like the one we’ve conjured up in our heads? Or would it be a life to be grateful for? There are others looking in who envy your life, who are wishing for a life like yours, who are perhaps even fighting for it. Take a step back and let’s quit making it out to be so bad. Because it really isn’t. It could be worse. And there’s a lot going for you, for many of us.
(Image: We Heart It)
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re doing the best you can. It’s easy to hold onto our mistakes. But that’s the past. Learn to let go and move forward. Learn to look ahead. Learn to forgive yourself. None of us need to be superhuman to have a super life.
(Image: The Red Fairy Project)
We punish ourselves for the past. We punish ourselves for things outside our control. We punish ourselves for not fitting the perfect mould. Why do we torture ourselves? We need to stop dwelling on what we cannot change and shouldn’t need to change. We need to start embracing where we’ve been and where we’re going. We need to love who we are and work towards who we want to be. Because it’s going to be pretty awesome. Let’s not dull the sparkle.
Stop beating yourself up about things that have been and gone. We all make mistakes. The past is dead, so why do we keep bringing it back to life in the present? Why do we keep carrying it on our backs, only to suffer under the weight? We cannot change anything. Nor should we regret anything. Everything is a learning curve; even steps backwards are actually steps forward. Stop living in the past and work on being a better you in the moment you’ve got.
You owe it to yourself, the world, the power that created you, to live. That means doing your best, expressing gratitude, enjoying yourself, letting go of what hurts you, focusing on the moment, spreading the love, challenging your fears, being yourself. It looks different for everyone but it’s guided by the same principles. Don’t live half-heartedly. Live passionately, enthusiastically, sincerely, generously, and to the fullest.
Today is where yesterday and tomorrow meet. Today is where yesterday has brought you. Today is where you decide yesterday won’t define tomorrow. Today is where you change tomorrow by acting today. Today is where possibility lies, with yesterday written and tomorrow not yet created. Today is what we have now. Do something your future self will thank you for, but most of all cherish today as if there were no yesterday and no tomorrow.
Remember why you started and keep going. Look back at how far you’ve come and keep going. Imagine where you could be and keep going. Keep going, keep trying, keep hustling. Think how much you’ll have to show for it. Whether you end up making a u-turn, staring at a crossroad, or coming to a dead-end, just keep going. Don’t sit on the fence and let life pass by.
To heal a wound, we have to stop touching it. To move on from the past, we have to stop reliving it. It will take time, willpower, forgiveness, courage and compassion. But it will get better, as long as we keep ourselves moving forwards and looking forwards. That’s the direction we should be heading.
Life is a series of moments, a series of nows, a series of choices, a series of yeses and nos, a series of ups and downs. Stop obsessing about what’s past, gone, done, what could have been, what should have been, what might be or not be. Focus on the moment, the now, the choice you have today. There won’t be another one just like it, and it can make all the difference.