We’ve all felt the urge to speak ill of others at one time or another. Sometimes we do it to feel better about ourselves. Sometimes we do it to fit in. Sometimes we do it out of frustration and anger. Sometimes we mean it and sometimes we don’t. But it’s still dangerous, for both ourselves and for others. It poisons the air with negativity that gets harder and harder to breathe. People won’t want to be around us and soon we won’t want to be around ourselves. It never does make us feel better, but makes others feel worse. It never does help us fit in, because what goes around comes around. Don’t kick someone down in efforts to give yourself a lift up. You’ll only find yourself further at the bottom somewhere else.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but don’t let it break you. Sometimes it feels like life is hitting us constantly, not even giving us time to get back up before hitting us down again. But there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. There is always a way out. There is always another path. Keep your eyes open or maybe take a look at things from a different perspective. Most of all, keep going, and you’ll get to wherever you want to be.
We waste too much time worrying over little things and crying about trivial things. And we lose out on time we could be spending enjoying life because of it. Something might seem like the end of the world today but we probably won’t even remember it later on. If you find yourself feeling down about something that won’t matter in five years, don’t spend more than five minutes being sad about it. Something better is round the corner.
Tip One: Stop comparing yourself to others
It’s said time and time again, but we can’t seem to get away from it. But it’s so counter-productive! We’re all different. Some of us excel in certain things and some of us suck at them. We all have something we’re better at and worse at. We all in different stories, at different chapters, with equally beautiful endings. Start playing to your strengths and working on your weaknesses. Be better than you were yesterday, not better than the other person in the room.
Tip Two: Don’t just think it, say it
Thinking positively about yourself is harder than it sounds. But if we hear it, maybe we’ll start to listen. Stand in front of the mirror every morning and take a look at what you see. Let yourself know something you love about yourself and say it out loud. Or start the day with a positive affirmation out loud. It may feel weird at the beginning, but it will quickly sink in and transform your mindset.
Tip Three: Look at mistakes as spring boards
Failure and mistakes shouldn’t be looked at as the enemy. They’re actually the key to our success, but only if we act on them in the correct way. Instead of punishing yourself over mistakes you’ve made, focus on what you can learn from them and how you can use those teachings as fuel to greater success.
Tip Four: Gather some perspective
Sometimes we need to step out of our own heads and look at our situation from the outside. What would your friends say if they knew what you were saying about yourself? What would you say to a friend in a similar situation? Challenge yourself on the negative things you say to yourself and don’t be so hard on yourself. Most of the things we actually beat ourselves up on aren’t a big deal like we’re making them out to be.
Tip Five: Focus on solutions, not just problems
Sometimes we feel like we deserve the negative self-talk. But really it doesn’t do us any favours. When we talk negatively about ourselves, we’re often focusing too much on the problems instead of thinking about what we could do to solve them and thinking about the action. But focusing on the solutions will automatically move your mind to a positive space, and the problem won’t seem as bad.
Not every day will be a ‘good’ day. But there’s still something good in every day, no matter how small: an accomplishment, a smile, a hug, a chat, a cup of coffee, a book, a bath, a walk, a song. If today isn’t turning out to be a good day, there’s still time to turn it around. Bad days don’t equal a bad life. They just make us appreciate the good even more.
The energy we exhale into the world will quickly become the air we breathe. If we always focus on what’s wrong in our lives, on what’s wrong in others, on what’s wrong with the world, life will always seem drained of good and hope, because it’s all we’ll ever notice. But if we believe in ourselves and root for others, if we love ourselves and treat others well, the world will look abundant and generous. Be mindful of the energies you send out into the world, because the one most likely to suffer from it is yourself. Look at life with positivity, and you life will instantly be transformed.
(Image: We Heart It)
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re doing the best you can. It’s easy to hold onto our mistakes. But that’s the past. Learn to let go and move forward. Learn to look ahead. Learn to forgive yourself. None of us need to be superhuman to have a super life.
(Image: The Red Fairy Project)